Midnight Musings

So I observed something. I observed that, for some unknown reason, most bloggers state in their first post "this is my first blog" or "this is my first post to my blog" -- even I seem to be guilty of that.

I also observed that many personal blogs are self-serving -- including my own. Why not? It's a free opportunity to say anything we want about anything at all. What I find interesting though, is most people are really superficial about what they post. High school games mostly, crabbing about who likes who, who doesn't like who, petty ante stuff.

Why is it exactly that we can't be "real" with each other? Why is everything a cheap little high school game? Why can't spouses deal with each other at an open and honest level?

I also don't understand the obsessive need to be "right" and "justified." My wife and I have had a number of fights over the years, and most of them boil down to one or the other of us having to be "right." Of course, as the man, I'm never right, but that's beside the point. However, even the times I'm not trying to be "right", but just achieve some recognition of a point, she turns it around on me and tries to force me into being "wrong." If the argument is about the cleanliness of the house, it's my fault for not picking it up, or for me dumping things, she never contributes to the mess.

Why are we so irresponsible about taking responsibility for our behavior? Why are we so blind to it that we try to construe our own behavior as acceptable, while turning someone else's perfectly acceptable behavior into something twisted and wrong? Furthermore, why do I have to be sensitive to other people's feelings when they are so insensitive to mine? It's okay for someone else to make a fat joke, but god forbid if I look at someone the wrong way.

I'm taking a class called Interpersonal Skills. Some of my classmates don't see the value in the class. I see the value, but what I don't understand is, why am I taking this class when so many others won't? I mean, sure, I have higher goals for my life and career than maybe some other people do. But still, why is that responsibility solely on my shoulders?

Yeah, this is a whiny, selfish post. Shit happens. But the thing is, as humans, we all have some of these feelings I've described above. Yet despite that, we are really, really insensitive to others. We are really, horribly, selfish beings, and most of us will never even acknowledge that fact, much less do anything about it.

Reason #256 why I barely post to my blog: I don't have the time to focus on myself to be whiney and bitchy about other people in a medium such as this.